Update!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JASMINE LENG XIU LIAN!

Today, Douglas asked me something that I never want to share... I think I found the answer to it....
Douglas: Pam, Can I ask you something?
Me: What? Just shoot!
Douglas: Okay! I just wanna ask you if you still remember the big hiccup of your life last 31st August?
Me: YES! I still remember it.. Why?
Douglas: Do you still mind about it? Does it really still bother you?
Me: Frankly speaking, YES! I mind! I still mind it. It really still bother me a lot!
Douglas: Does it still hurts whenever someone brought it out or when you thought of it??
Me: Yes, it still hurts me a lot. Until now, I still cannot forget what was said to me...
Douglas: Is it the reason why you don't want to meet us out on that date this year?
Me: YES! I think I can no longer forget 31st August this day. And to be honest, at time I still had nightmare over it. The incident still haunt me every now and then.
Douglas: What?! Really?! Omy.. I think that really hurt you a lot.
Me: YES! Anyway, can we stop talking about this topic...

Then he changed to another topic..
Douglas: Another thing to ask..
Me: Again? Ok. Say!
Douglas: Your blog entry.. Regarding that Patricia Mok..
Me: Ya? Then?
Douglas: Does it links to that incident?
Me: Yes. It linked. And I really had a big impact on both.
Douglas: Clever me man. Never expect to guess it correctly!
Me: Please don't ask anymore...

We just ended our convo just like that.. I think everything happened for its reason. Be it good or bad. But, I can say it honestly, until today, I still cannot forget about those harsh words that ran into my ears on that day.. I still remember everything. In my nightmare, everything just repeat. Same as that day. How I wish 31st August can don't come! Seriously, if want me to walk out of it. It is very hard. I think I will be haunt by it for the rest of my life...

Anyway, that Patricia Mok's thing is really a loud wake up call for me. CHANGE is what I WANT!!!! Thanks Jerene for giving me a listening ears on Thursday. Thank you so much!