Human factor...

Human factor is something that doesn't come to my mind at all. My first full-time job, no matter how bad the environment and the people, I stayed on for at least 18months before leaving for my current job.

At first, everything was fine over at my current workplace. Bosses and colleagues are friendly and good. Nothing much to complain about. Nothing to bother about. But things weren't the same ever since I entered my 6th month working here, ever since the new salesgirl, J entered into our office.

Sometimes, I really wonder if J did bring her brain or heart to work a not. She has been with us for 2-3 months but, she doesn't seem to know her work very well. And one thing I cannot stand is, one particular stuff, she can asked multiple of times and yet forget, even if she noted them down, next moment she will ask again. Can't you have some initiative in the right place?

Nevermind, I can still hang on to work even with such person in my office. But slowly, thing changes, the colleague, C who was very closed to me, started to be closed to her and we drifted apart. Maybe because I am closed to the bosses or anything, I don't know.

And once, I overheard them gossiping about me. Nevermind, I said to myself. Slowly, I became so quiet in office. We behaved like a total stranger in office. That kind of initial comfort was gone as days passed by. Maybe I am jealous about them being closed, but never do I have a single bad idea of sow discording them because I know that if one can turn the back at you, she can do it to anyone else. So, I decided to let things be. I never confront them about anything. As, I don't see a single need of it. But, I realised that J was the factor, the cause of all these. She was the one who sow discorded our friendship.

Furthermore, I realised one thing, FRIENDS and COLLEAGUES cannot co-exist, which is true... so true. One thing that I really can't get it right is that when J did something wrong at work or screw things up, C will try to talk to me and wait for me to knock off together. On our way back home, she will tell me about J. But they were so closed, I don't see why is there a need to talk me bad about J. Maybe, C wanted to get things out of me and see what insider news I've got from the bosses.

After a few occasions, I started to realise it and hence, I decided to close myself up. I never talk to any one of them. And now, I think I am the "BAD" person in my office. Everyone seems to be my enemies. Recently, as I am doing part-time studies, and my exam are around the corner, I decided to apply three 1/2 day leave to revise on my exam, but seems like some people weren't happy about it. But, who cares?

Sometime, I am really sick and tired of facing such human war or maybe mind games. I am a person who do things with feeling. I like it, I like it. I don't like it, I don't like it. Don't need to say so much. I won't hide or act in front of others. I preferred being REAL. But I really can't stand people acting, I really feel like tearing off the layered of masks they are wearing. Sick and tired of facing hypocrites.

I really don't know what to do and how to survive in this working environment anymore. I feel like quitting but I love my job and also my bosses treat me very good. Should I quit my job because of C & J?! I really don't know.

Now, I really think that no matter how good the environment is, human factor still play the most important role.